Friday Funnies

I took the boys to the library as an exercise in sitting still and being quiet. Mack had the kids librarian on her hands and knees for about 15 minutes searching for a book on the Incredible Hulk and Pierson was too interested in the aquarium with rubber snakes and bugs to be bothered with the likes of books. On our way out the door my purse broke. The handle just snapped and I said, quite calmly I might ad, "Well..it finally happened. Mommy's fake Burberry purse finally broke!". I shrugged my shoulders, gathered my belongings that had fallen out of the purse and forged on. Mack then says to me:

Mack: Maybe it's time for you to get a new purse.
Me: Oh, no buddy. I have lots of purses at home. It's ok.
Mack: Well I saw one tv that they've come out with this new kind of purse. It's for people who are blind.
Me: (at this point intrigued but also making a mental note to limit his television viewing time) "Really..for people who are blind?"
Mack: Well..not really for people who are blind but for people who can't see things in their purse (mental note #2..review what being blind really means) because it's too messy. It's a new purse to help you be better organized.
Boy, does this kid know me or what! My purse is a nightmare and is in need of some organization.

We have started the most enjoyable process of potty training Pierson. So far, big brother Mack is much more interested in the exercises in futility that I have come up with. While Pierson won't sit on the potty he will at least humor me enough to stand on a stool "big boy style" and attempt to go. We have already made up a few songs and tried a few tricks but so far, no dice. I saved a bag of stale Apple Jacks and I throw one in the toilet and tell him to pee on the cereal. He thinks this is funny and likes to talk about it but has yet to actually release pee from his body. Mack on the other hand, boy is his aim improving! I think I found a way to keep those mysterious dried puddles of urine off the back of the toilet. Our other trick is letting Pierson flush his poop after he goes in the diaper. If it's a "flusher" I gingerly "release" it from the diaper into the toilet and from this fun activity came this exchange:
Pierson: Mama, let's flush it!
Me: Ok, buddy come on...let's go flush it.
Pierson: I'll stand over here so it doesn't splash my socks.
Me: Oh..I won't let it splash your socks. It's ok
Mack: I'll flush it! I want to flush it!
Pierson: No! I want to flush it! Me flush it!
Mack and Pierson vie for good flushing position and banter back and forth for a few seconds
Me: Oh, Mack. It's his poop..let him flush it!
Pierson: Yeah, Mack! It's my poop!
Me: Sigh

After returning from a night of swimming at an area hotel Mack announced proudly to dad..
"I even swam in the deep end and I didn't drown!"

Pierson came home from daycare with a scooby doo sticker on his shirt. He loved it and was very sad when he noticed at the dinner table that it was missing.
Pierson: Oh no! My Scooby sticker.
Mom: Uh, oh..it must have come off while we were playing. We will find it.
Mack: Unless we have a fire tonight and it burns up in the fire.
Mom: Mack!! Don't say that. We are not going to have a fire. Don't say that..you'll scare him!
Mack: I'm just sayin'..if we have a fire tonight and it's still missing..it will burn up in the fire. I'm just saying it could happen.
This isn't really as funny as it is alarming. This is SO my child!

That's all folks! Have a great weekend!
xoxo