Gettin' outta Dodge aint no easy task

Despite the fact that I have three million and two things to do before I catch a VERY early flight out of Traverse City tomorrow morning I felt quite compelled to post. I don't have time to do a proper Friday Funnies so I'm going to touch on what's been funny along with what's not been so funny.

I may never leave town again. It's just too hard. And it's not just the guilt that I spoke of in an earlier post. There is a lot to do just to be able to leave for a few days or in my case nine. I'm trying to make my absence as easy as possible on my husband in the sense that I don't expect him to take an entire week off of work so I can go play. So there's the figuring out who will go where and with whom, when. It's a crazy little puzzle that I had finally figured out and had started to feel less anxious about. That is until American Airlines canceled my flight from Chicago to San Diego and I had to be re booked. A big thank you to Liz, the delightful customer relations representative, who was nice enough to find me another flight. The only problem, it leaves tomorrow morning at 6:55 am. This would not be such a big deal except that I had seriously crafted my perfect itinerary when originally booking with American Airlines and had arranged everyone else's day accordingly. So, it was as though Pierson had grabbed hold of my perfect little puzzle and in his words "wrecked" it. I put this on him because he is the puzzle master in our family and I think he has more fun taking it apart than putting it together. There's something quite destructive about that one. All boy.

So, speaking of Pierson, I was on hold with American Airline for a good 25 minutes waiting to speak to my good friend Liz to find out if I was going to be able to get on another flight. My dear little boy came into the kitchen and announced that he wanted to go outside. In my on hold whisper I said "Not now buddy. It's too chilly". He retorted, "I WANT TO GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW AND GO IN MY SANDBOX". More frantic sounding now, I said "Pierson, I need you to go into the other room and wait for me there because mommy is trying to make a very important phone call". He's mad now, "You not speak to me like like that" (glad he's hearing something I say to him). I point my finger toward the living room and say "Go, Pierson. Please go into the other room". Here's where it gets good, he says: "I want you to go away mommy!" to which I calmly reply "I am trying to go away Pierson. I am trying very, very hard to go away!". At this point reduced to his level, I continue: "Hopefully tomorrow mommy will be on an airplane flying very, very far away and you will not need to worry about the way I am speaking to you!". He looked at me and said something about not wanting me to go away and then Liz came on the line and saved us from any further conversation.

Another conversation worth noting was with my husband over dinner last night. It's amazing how one little thing spirals into many and before you know it you end up with something like this:

Me: Hey, I was thinking, If I perish on this trip you will be screwed because my blackberry will go down with me and all of our contacts are in it.
Peter: What? Why would I need your blackberry?
Me: Well..I assume you'd like to call people so they can come to my funeral. Not that there would be a body b/c if there's a plane crash you'd probably just have to have a memorial or something.
Peter: Not necessarily, they usually find body parts and return them to the families.
Me: Ok, well you can take my finger and bury it then. Hey, you'd save on a burial plot because you wouldn't need a full size coffin for just a finger.
Peter: Do you want to be buried in Michigan?
Me: Where else would I want to be buried. I don't want to be buried in Virginia! Actually, I don't know if I really want to be buried.
Peter: Well, that's something you should really probably communicate to me so I know what to do just in case.
Me: I just don't really think you need to come talk to a rock to be able to remember me. I would hope you find other ways to remember me.
Peter: I want at least a rock when I die, even if there's no body because I want to be worshipped.
Mack: Workshop! What workshop?
Me: Ooh..that would be a good thing for you to do with the boys while I'm gone. See if there are any Home Depot workshops going on.
Peter: Yeah, Tim said he and Ben made a flower box.

At that point, I was done. If for some reason I do perish on this trip, at least you will all have this final crazy conversation to remember me and my chaotic mind. Love to you all. My husband may "guest post" while I am gone so check back periodically for updates.
xoxo